Dr. M C Jain
Watching body language in addition to what is spoken might just save you from being a victim of fraud, or it could help you figure out when somebody’s being genuine. The police as have often seen do this during an interrogation.
One is supposed to learn the little facial and body expressions that can help you distinguish a lie from the truth. Here are some steps and tips to do so.
Learn to recognize deflections. Usually when people are lying, they will tell stories that are true but are deliberately aimed at not answering the question you asked. If a person responds to the question “Did you ever hit your wife?” with an answer such as “I love my wife, why would I do that?”, the suspect is technically telling a truth, but they are avoiding answering your original question, which usually means they’re lying.
Mind exaggerated details. See if they are telling you too much, like “My mom is living in France, isn’t it nice there? Don’t you like the Eiffel tower? It’s so clean there.” Too many details may tip you off to their desperation to get you to believe them.
Illustrators, and manipulators. Illustrators are a sign of telling the truth, this is when you are using your hand gestures to talk. Moving your hands while you are talking is a sign of telling the truth. We also have manipulators. These, are the opposite of illustrators. An example of a manipulator can be playing with your wrist-watch, your jewelry, pulling on your ear lobe, etc. People who behave this way tend to be hiding something. The last, commonly unknown sign of hiding something is reptile tissue, most people have a reptile tissue in their nose, and it itches when you’re hiding something. But, before you assume that the person is hiding something, please establish a base line.
Base Line: A base line is what someone acts like when they are not laying. You have to get a base line before you proceed with anything. Imagine you have a itch on your nose ever since you got out of bed. And someone thinks you are hiding something because you scratch your nose when answering a question…oops. What the person should have done is establish a baseline. To establish a baseline, you need to see the person when they aren’t lying. Try asking what their name is, and what they do for a living.
Look out for micro-expressions. Micro-expressions are split second facial expressions that flash on a person’s face for a less than a 25th of a second and reveal the person’s true emotion underneath their facade. Some people may be naturally sensitive to them, but almost anybody can easily train to be able to detect micro expressions. Put focus to the upper and lower eyelids, the corner of the eyes, the mouth and the muscles surrounding the mouth, the eyebrows and forehead.
Shaking hands… When you meet the person who you think is deceiving you, shake their hand. Take note of the temperature. When you are sure they are lying to you, pretend to be leaving and quickly grab their hand for a “Good-Bye” Handshake. If the temperature is colder, they are fearful.
Be aware of their emotional responses
*Pay close attention to the person’s reaction to your questions. A liar will often feel uncomfortable and turn their head or body away, or even subconsciously put an object between the two of you. Also, while an innocent person would go on the offensive (usually responding with anger, which will usually be revealed in a micro expression directly after you say you don’t believe them), a guilty person will often go immediately on the defensive (usually by saying something to reassure their facts, such as deflections).
Listen for a subtle delay in responses to questions. An honest answer comes quickly from memory. Lies require a quick mental review of what they have told others to avoid inconsistency and to make up new details as needed. However, when people look up to remember things, it does not necessarily mean that they are lying.
Be conscious of their usage of words. Verbal expression can give many clues as to whether a person is lying, such as:
*Using/repeating your own exact words when answering a question
*Not using contractions
*Avoiding direct statements or answers (deflections)
*Speaking excessively in an effort to convince
*Speaking in a monotonous tone
*Speaking in muddled sentences
*Vocal pitch rising
*Using classic qualifiers such as “I’m only going to say this once…”
*Using humor and sarcasm to avoid the subject
*Using Deflections (beating around the bush, not answering the question.)
Allow silence to enter the conversation.
Change the subject quickly. While an innocent person would be confused by the sudden shift in the conversation and may try to return to the previous subject, a liar will be relieved and welcome the change. You may see the person become more relaxed and less defensive.
Watch his or her throat. A person may constantly be either trying to lubricate their throat when he/she lies by swallowing or clearing their throat to relieve the tension built up. A person’s voice can also be a good lie indicator; they may suddenly start talking faster or slower than normal, or their tension may result in a higher-pitched speaking tone.
Check the facts. If you have the means, check the validity of what the liar is saying. A skilled liar might give some reason why you shouldn’t talk to the person who could confirm or deny a story. Perhaps the liar will infer that the person is particularly favorable towards the liar, or that the person would have little time for you. These are probably lies themselves, so might be worthwhile overcoming your reluctance and to check with the person you’ve been warned against.
Judge the character. Most people tell the truth most of the time, and will cherish their reputation. Liars will ’sail close to the wind’ – they’ll artificially bolster their reputation so that they seem more credible or desirable than they actually are.
*If you overhear a version of an anecdote that seems wrong, listen to those alarm bells – it might be a liar.
*If someone takes the time out to ingratiate them with you out of the blue, it’s very flattering, but you have to ask, why are they doing that?
*If someone rubbishes or smears people more than normal, he is possibly putting in the groundwork so the audience are more receptive to him , and less receptive to the people who he has lied to – they’re discredited before they can say ‘he is a liar’.