Rajendra Dhar

“Lawyers are the only persons in whom ignorance of the law is not punished.”

“The minute you read something that you can’t understand, you can almost be sure that it was drawn up by a lawyer. ”

“How lawyers make work for one another! They are all priests, worshipping the same god. No wonder you adore one another.”

“Lawyers have a way of seeing that sets them apart from the rest of us. In some way this special vision makes them invaluable, and in other ways, repulsive. Lawyers are much more focused on rational, logical, and objective criteria to the exclusion of the emotional, subjective, and sometimes irrational reponses to the world. Moreover, lawyers like to show no emotion, and possess a particular disdain for the emotions that are found in others, which has the quality of making them seem inhuman.”

“The Utopians have no lawyers among them, for they consider them as a sort of people whose profession it is to disguise matters and to wrest the laws, and, therefore, they think it is much better that every man should plead his own cause, and trust it to the judge, as in other places the client trusts it to a counsellor; by this means they both cut off many delays and find out truth more certainly; for after the parties have laid open the merits of the cause, without those artifices which lawyers are apt to suggest, the judge examines the whole matter, and supports the simplicity of such well-meaning persons, whom otherwise crafty men would be sure to run down; and thus they avoid those evils which appear very remarkably among all those nations that labour under a vast load of laws.” — SIR THOMAS MORE, Utopia

“There is a vague popular belief that lawyers are necessarily dishonest. I say vague, because when we consider to what extent confidence and honours are reposed in and conferred upon lawyers by the people, it appears improbable that their impression of dishonesty is very distinct and vivid. Yet the impression is common, almost universal. Let no young man choosing the law for a calling for a moment yield to the popular belief. Resolve to be honest at all events; and if in your own judgment you cannot be an honest lawyer, resolve to be honest without being a lawyer. Choose some other occupation, rather than one in the choosing of which you do, in advance, consent to be a knave.” — ABRAHAM LINCOLN, memorandum for law lecture, 1850

“Lawyers are merchants of misery.”

“Lawyers are operators of toll bridges which anyone in search of justice must pass.”

“A countryman between 2 Lawyers, is like a fish between two cats.” — BENJAMIN FRANKLIN, Poor Richard’s Almanack, 1737

“The question arises … whether all lawyers are the same. This is like asking whether everything that gets into a sewer is garbage.”

“We don’t operate a system that guarantees a trial lawyer will really know what he or she is doing before handling a trial. Qualify as an attorney and you immediately have the right to screw up somebody’s case in court. We lawyers have been left with a huge field in which to demonstrate our incompetence.” — KEITH EVANS, Common Sense Rules of Advocacy for Lawyers

“There is not a more fatal error to young lawyers than relying too much on speechmaking. If any one, upon his rare powers of speaking, shall claim an exemption from the drudgery of the law, his case is a failure in advance.”

“Lawyers Are”: “A learned gentleman who rescues your estate from your enemies and keeps it himself.”

“Divorce lawyers stoke anger and fear in their clients, knowing that as long as the conflicts remain unresolved the revenue stream will keep flowing.”

“Where there is a rift in the lute, the business of the lawyer is to widen the rift and gather the loot.”

And God said: “Let there be Satan, so people don’t blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don’t blame everything on Satan.”